Saturday, January 9, 2010

Frustrating!

So I haven't been writing lately though I don't know who read this blog anymore.....I am pretty much writing for my own sake I guess. New Years was good. Joey and I went over to Kat's House. I helped her plan the party and I ended up dying the whole time there and my ankle blew up to the size of a house. Just the left one aka my RSD Ankle. I am sooooo frustrated with my RSD in general and also I am frustrated with Workman's Comp!
I woke up this morning and my mother gave me a report from an email I got about my Workman's Comp case stating that I really didn't have RSD that is is really cause I am overweight and to put a horrible cherry on top of all that stated they called my mother enabling!
How can they get off saying things like that?! I am the one with the Neurological disease called RSD not my mother....she has nothing to do with this!!! How dare they attack her?! I can deal with what they say about me because I am used to it but bringing my mother into this is the last fricking straw! You thinking I was fighting barely before but now they brought my family into this and now it is all out war now!
You try to help your family while you want to crawl into a ball and die because the pain is through the roof and your whole leg is spasming!? I would like to see any of those pencil pushers deal half of what I deal with on a daily basis! UG! I just can't believe it!
Anyway enough being pissed off at the state.
Sorry if this offended anyone.....I am just sooo tired of bending over backwards and being in this horrid pain. I just want to be able to sleep without having to use a sleep aid because I can't fall asleep or stay asleep because of my pain. I am tired of dealing with the shocks and the swelling within my legs. I am tired of people not believing me!
I am so tired that I just wanna run away but that isn't possible! I am injured! I just wanna get better. I am 22 years old! I have dreams I wanna be a regular member of society and I just want my life back!

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