Monday, February 25, 2013

A good friend of mine sent this to me on a really horrid day this week. I sat there at cried through the whole thing. It hit me in places that I never knew I had. I am a wide eyed naive child in the eyes of the world. I tend to trust people a lot more than I should I try to open my hands and open my heart and let everyone in that I can fit. Then wonder why I get hurt so often. This tends to make me pull back into myself. Pull inside and brood and grump. Lately I have been like this. Just pulling inside not allowing anyone in, sometimes not even my husband. Just complaining and allowing whatever is going on eat at me. Why ruin the wonderful person I am? Why ruin the outlook I have? Why not allow the pain of life and everything else to teach me instead of hurting me. I collapse into this continual circle of self doubt, and self pity. Thinking that I am this horrible screw up and that my life doesn't make a difference. The problem with this thinking is who does this hurt? Not only myself...but each and every person that I touch.
I have to stop trying to muddle through only giving 50%.....I need to focus on how to make my 100% healthier and more productive and help make my world and those around me better.

Sunday, February 3, 2013

I am continually reminded how very important is. A couple weeks ago I stopped talking to some of the people I lean on most. Not because I didn't care about them it was because I became too busy. This is where I went wrong. I forget when I get busy that I still need support as well. Support is like air for those of us who have been through traumatic diseases/situations like RSD/CRPS. The longer I wasn't near my support the more and more I became bitter and began to mope. I even went as far as to start assuming things about the very people who supported me the most. Moral of the story. Stick to getting support!

Saturday, January 26, 2013

I haven't been writing here and that is a shame. I won't make excuses because it should have been done a long time ago. Been working with a new family. One boy (4) and two twin girls (2). They have tested both my limits emotionally and physically, but they have tested my RSD as well. I do care greatly for them but sometimes it is hard. I have been doing a lot with RSD/CRPS Doesn't Own Me. We started making awareness posters for RSD/CRPS and Chronic Pain. 140 Million people suffer from Chronic Pain in the United States and that is WAY too much! There are more people suffering from RSD/CRPS than that of MS, HIV/AIDS, and Breast Cancer in the United States combined. That is insane. No one should have this disease or suffer in this fashion. It isn't right so to get the awareness out there in hopes that someone who has the key sees it and starts caring enough to do something about it. I thought I would post some of my favorites.

This one really shows the way RSD/CRPS feels inside. A Raging fire encased in cold hard unforgiving ice.

This one hits me in the heart everytime. There has been children as young as 2 being diagnosed with this disease.

One person suffering with Chronic Pain is too much!

Our Volunteer Karen made this one! She is awesome and is a great friend!

Chose this one because we thought it looked like the hand was reaching out for help.

It is truly sad that the medical world knows little to nothing or doesn't care to educate themselves more on RSD/CRPS

These are my legs. When I flare my right leg mirrors the left pain wise and you truly cannot tell them apart. But looks aren't everything. Pain is still pain and I still want a cure.

This quote came from a video I did about a year ago. I have used this vision in the past but it was nice to put it on a picture.
So many judge us on our outward appearance. "Oh she is so young there could in no way shape or form be anything wrong with her." Yet the sad thing there is something wrong and I am suffering inside. Please don't judge?
This was the hardest to make I have lost a bunch of my RSD friends to suicide because they just couldn't take it anymore.
They call it the "Suicide" disease for a reason. There is no way out, no treatments, that truly work for everyone.
I believe Support is the most important thing in the world.
This was our most popular.
People do not believe when we say that it is really bad. It is high than childbirth, cancer, and getting a limb cut off.
Needless to say these all are heart breaking in their own way. Please educate those around you of this disease. There are so many suffering and so many more going each day undiagnosed and alone. Please I beg of you don't allow others to suffer alone! Christa W. Founder of RSD/CRPS Doesn't Own Me